Affection, Acceptance and Approval

Affection, Acceptance and Approval

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An article that appeared in The Dallas Morning News was particularly fascinating because the author was writing about Vitamin A (for affection) which is advocated by Inez Bloomingdale who is the owner and director of Miss Bloomingdale's Academy, a child care center in Las Colinas. Miss Bloomingdale pointed out that she doesn't merely operate a business, but that she wants to make sure children have all they need to help them grow. She received the Paul Harris Award from the Dallas Rotary Club which is given to recognize a lifetime commitment to education.

Miss Bloomingdale is "right on." Research indicates that all of us have a need for affection and everybody wants to be accepted and to gain approval. We also want to be right and to be understood. Unfortunately, we all cannot always be right but all of us can listen attentively to a person, whether child or adult. If we cannot agree with their position, we can give them personal approval for the originality of their ideas. With children and, for that matter, with adults affection is important. We all have a "skin hunger" that can only be satisfied with genuine affection from an unselfishly caring person. The parent or teacher of any kind who demands certain performances before they give acceptance causes the recipient to wonder if they have performed well enough to "deserve" that acceptance.

Approval comes in many forms. A simple "good job" or "congratulations" or "my, I like the way you shined your shoes (or brushed your hair) this morning" is sometimes all a struggling child needs to hear to feel they are worthwhile.

Combine what Ms. Bloomingdale is teaching with the fact that over 60% of a child's working vocabulary is acquired by age three and 80% of their character is formed by age five, as well as 90% of their personality by age seven, and you can understand why Ms. Bloomingdale receives such high accolades. Follow her approach to dealing with your children and I'll SEE YOU - and the kids - AT THE TOP!

Zig Ziglar is known as America’s Motivator. He authored 33 books and produced numerous training programs. He will be remembered as a man who lived out his faith daily.