Show #418: Your marriage needs stress

Show #418: Your marriage needs stress


If it’s strong it will bolster your entire life. If it’s weak, it will cripple your world. Host Kevin Miller is joined by his wife, Teri, to discuss a message from Zig. They cover 1) What is the value of a good marriage and 2) What is the foundation of a good marriage? Thank you to Wealth Front and Earth Class Mail for supporting this show!

Hi, everyone, this is Kevin and this is Ziglar’s True Performance Show, episode 418. Today I’m sitting in the studio live with my wife, Teri, to cover one of Zig’s favorite topics…the dire necessity and glory of healthy relationship…especially in your marriage! We just did a live Facebook video and had a dramatic amount of people show up to comment and ask questions…and in the first 60 minutes there have been almost 20,000 views. If you want to see it, go to Facebook and type in Zig Ziglar. If you’re hearing this at a later time, you can go to the videos tab and look for date August 24, 2016. And, please, like and share it so others can find Ziglar!

Here is Zig:

1. What is the value of a good marriage?

Context from Zig:

Happier at home, more successful in work.

Value of a good marriage for overall success. Having a healthy, joyful, fulfilling relationship. What does it add to success? Reminds me of The Millionaire Next Door -- the majority of wealthy people are married and stay married to the same person.

  • I see one of three things happen:
    1. Good marriage, much more inspired, and successful at work
    2. Poor marriage, hampered at work, hard to excel when things at home aren’t good. Both just…survive in relative mediocrity
    3. Poor marriage, separate from it and devote to work, excel there and marriage continues a decline and usually ends because both want true connection
  • On #1, it’s not to be dependent on your spouse, but…I believe God uses people to encourage and support us.
  • If you are successful at work, what’s the point if not to bless others?
  • What are you to provide your family? If you are just a paycheck…then your life insurance would probably provide better. One million dollars, invest it at 10% and your family has $100k a year to live on.

2. What is the foundation of a good marriage?

Context from Zig:

Dr. Smiley Blanton says he’s never known a senile person, regardless of age, who developed a genuine interest and care and affection for other people.

  • Care and affection. Meaning…you’re not self-focused…which is health.
  • And you mean something to another, which is where we find our main purpose.
  • Grandmother, Mensa Society, always invested in her brain, which should keep it healthy. However, she was a bitter woman who never gave care and affection to anyone else, and didn’t receive any true care and affection from others. She died relatively young and alone, except for the caretaking of my parents.
  • Caring for another is a primary thing that keeps us going, inspired…again, we matter.
  • For marriage, though, the genuine interest. We’ve had this good and bad. What does it look like? Having to do and like the exact same things? “You mountain bike with me and I do ballet with you?”

3. What percentage of a marriage should be friendship, partnership or romance?

Context from Zig:

The guy said to Zig that even though Zig and Jean were older, they had more fire and passion than he and his wife did.

  • Well, that just opens a can of worms, doesn’t it? Fire and passion. Is that important in a marriage?
  • Volatile topic, and honestly, we can’t tell you what it should be.
  • One side is what you believe and want…the other is what your spouse believes and wants.
  • There are some valid realities to consider. If we were talking health -- nutrition, exercise and sleep. If you leave out any one of those, you will be sorely lacking. But they don’t have to be equal.
  • FRIENDS: One couple may ultimately enjoy most…just being friends. They really enjoy the same activities and are thrilled to have a comfortable, amiable relationship.
  • PARTNERSHIP: I know a couple that owns a large real estate company together and they thrive on their partnership.
  • ROMANCE: Then there are those who you see putting great focus on date nights, romantic getaways and vacations, going out on the town together, and they are very affectionate.

All great, but can you leave the others out?

  • balance?
  • necessary investment in all, even if you major on one?
  • Teri and I…what would we say we do ratio-wise?