Show #440: Live your life, not theirs – with Rachel Cruze

Show #440: Live your life, not theirs – with Rachel Cruze

Rachel Cruze inspires our true performance by pointing out a primary reason we spend money we shouldn’t, and become controlled by it. What is it? Social status. In today’s culture, there is something causing us to do this more than ever, and I would not have guessed what it was before reading her book. The culprit? Social Media. It’s not the bad guy, but the “highlight reel” is causing us to spend. So, what do we do about it? Listen to the show! Thanks to new sponsor Hello Fresh, and Braintree, for their support of this episode of The Ziglar Show.

Welcome to The Ziglar Show, this is episode 440. In today’s show, Ziglar CEO and Zig’s son, Tom, joins me to interview a special guest. Our focus here is, of course, inspiring true performance. Our guest today does this in a fantastic way, by addressing a primary area in which we handicap ourselves and our performance, our efforts for status. This will be an angle you’ve likely never heard before. Join us!

Hey, folks, this is Kevin Miller, your honored host of The Ziglar Show. In today’s show, we bring you Rachel Cruze. Her new book is titled Love Your Life, Not Theirs.

She brings an angle on finances that is really intriguing, as she blatantly puts on the table the issue of…social status and comparison. It’s a big deal, folks. I highly encourage you to listen in as we dig in, and I really pushed on the hard realities we face.

If you don’t know Rachel…she’s an incredibly seasoned communicator for her young age as a Ramsey Personality, and has been speaking to groups as large as 10,000 for more than a decade. She’s the daughter of…Dave Ramsey, and officially joined Ramsey Solutions in 2010. She uses the knowledge and experiences from growing up in the Ramsey household to educate others on the proper way to handle their money wisely and stay out of debt. Rachel co-authored the #1 New York Times best-selling book Smart Money, Smart Kids with her dad. Her new book, Love Your Life, Not Theirs, released October 2016. You can follow Rachel on Twitter and Instagram at @RachelCruze and online at,, or

We started off with a bit of fun, but got into the trenches of this issue that affects us all…quickly.

Here I bring you Tom Ziglar, me…and Rachel Cruze:

Rachel, this is an honor. Quick story I don’t even know if you’re aware of…I married in 1993 and through Christ Church in Nashville, my wife Teri and I got to know your parents. Your dad, Dave, was hosting the fledgling Money Game radio show and selling his self-published Financial Peace book. He hired Teri to help…I think she was literally his first employee. And it led into him and your mom asking if she and I could also help…babysit. What a great fruition to now host you as our honored guest on The Ziglar Show!

> >Listen to Rachel’s response on the program

A primary message of Ziglar is legacy. You are part of a legacy of financial and life teaching. When did you realize this was the path for you?

>> Hear Rachel’s response on the show

Ok, before we get all serious, I’m sure you don’t spend money that’s not budgeted and available for spending. But when it comes to spending…what is your personal guilty pleasure? Ok…maybe not guilty for you…

>> Listen to Rachel on the program

And personally, what was the worst, most regrettable financial decision you’ve ever made?

>>Hear Rachel’s response on the program

As someone who has a HUGE impact on people, what’s the most memorable story you have experienced with someone you’ve been working with?

>>Listen to Rachel Cruze on the show

Before we get into the details of the book and your message, you make a statement right off the bat of your desire to “help people control their money so it doesn’t control them.”

If we zero in on the average American home, where is the mismanagement and unintentionality with how we deal with our money taking its toll most? What are the primary ravages of financial stress you see in today’s world?

>>Listen to Rachel’s responses on the program

DEBT! Debt is. Seventy percent of Americans are currently living paycheck to paycheck. This steals your motivation. When you go to work, you are working to pay off all of the bills you have. It makes it hard to sleep at night.

People who don’t live INTENTIONALLY. People who can look back and say, “I made X amount of dollars and I have NO idea where it went.”

People don’t have control of their money and don’t have a budget.

The title of your new book is Love Your Life, Not Theirs. This harkens to, and you, of course, make mention, of the issue of “keeping up with the Joneses.” I’d consider myself above that and living a life authentic unto myself, not caring about status and people’s perspective. Upon further reflection, I realize…that’s a bold-faced lie. How much of the way I live…would I model if I lived alone with my family on an island? So, just how big of an issue do you really feel societal pressure is on our spending behaviors?

>> Listen to Rachel’s responses on the show

This is a huge issue. You used to “keep up with the jones” by looking out your window. Now we have everyone looking at people through the “highlight reel” of people’s lives on social media. You don’t see the debt that people went into. We all struggle with it, because it’s difficult to see so many people living lives that look better than ours. Comparison steals your joy and your paycheck. It deals with our hearts. Contentment and gratification are strong foundations for us to build upon, but people tend to have their foundation shaken by all of the other people they see.

Golden Nugget: Be grateful for what you have, and be intentional about recognizing when you are comparing yourself to someone else.

OK, I want to push into this issue a bit, though. You know from a marketing and business aspect, that people DO judge a book by its cover. I’m in full agreement with you, and I don’t like pushback for pushback’s sake. I do, however, understand the challenge. We live in a world where we DO judge each other, to a significant degree, by status, job title, and physical accouterments…even appearance. I don’t like that, but realize I react and respond to it. Opportunity tends to come to those who look the part --at least…more opportunity. We, as a people, respect wealth and attribute credibility to it. When I sit down at a business table with nice clothes, nice watch, iPhone 6 and straight, pearly white teeth…I’m given more credibility.

So, in your teaching, how do you combat this very real pressure and reality?

>>Hear Rachel’s responses on the show

Being wise with money doesn’t mean you have to be “cheap.” Go buy a used, years-old Lexus. When we started off, we didn’t have much and we still presented ourselves without having the Rolex watch.

I saw on Facebook your gratitude challenge. How is this a primary tool to battle spending?

>>Listen to Rachel Cruze’s responses on the show

In a heart of gratitude there is no room for comparisons and discontentment. I used that to learn how to be content. My phone would be in my face before my feet hit the ground.

Actionable: Want to be more intentional with money? Ditch Instagram, Snapchat, and any other app that gives you a highlight reel of other people. Start a gratitude list and type a few everyday things down that you are grateful for.

You start your book off with a key Ziglar topic…habit. Before you talk about the social aspect we’ve just discussed, or even the topic of money, you drill in on habit. Your dad started teaching on money 25 years ago. How do you see the habits of today’s culture, and I’d ask even to your own generation, as different? More or less challenged?

>>Listen to Rachel’s responses on the show

It’s way more convenient for people to spend money. Studies have shown that you spend less with cash that lets you tangibly feel the money in your hands than you do with a credit card. We are taking the emotion out of money.

I’m curious, where do you literally see our culture today wasting money the most?

>>Hear Rachel’s responses on the program

People take their needs to the “grand extent.” Going to the spa feels like a need. You make the dinner out as a need by overplaying the value.

FOOD is always the connecting point for people when they overspend.

Can we categorize eating out or spa day in the budget as pleasures?

>>Listen to Rachel’s responses on the show

Definitely! Though you will need to say no to something else if you want to say yes to any of these. If it’s in the budget, then spend it. Otherwise… let it be.

When do people get the motivation to strap down and stick to a budget?

>>Hear Rachel’s comments on the show

Personal conviction comes into play. You get sick and tired of paying MasterCard and the payments for the two cars in the driveway. People have to want a different result. You have to want a change. Doing the same thing over and over again, expecting a different result, is the definition of INSANITY.

Tom brings up termite spending:

When you add up a bunch of little tiny bad habits and replace those with a bunch of tiny good habits every week for a year, you can have a new life.

What are the “termite habits” that cause people to go wrong?

Habit 1: People don’t check their checking account. People go into overdraft and don’t stay up with fees. People don’t know how much they have. People don’t know how much they make.

Habit 2: The myth of the credit card. Spending money using the credit card, which forces you to live through the rear-view mirror rather than living through the windshield, making a plan for the future. Use cash instead.

Habit 3: Not talking about money with your spouse. It can be days or years. They live dangerously by not talking about it. “I bought this, but I’m not going to tell my spouse”.

Tom’s thoughts: Take a walk with your spouse and talk money. Make sure you are transparent with each other.

Great quote from Tom:
If Dave Ramsey says every dollar should have a name, then I say every minute should have a purpose.

>>Listen to Rachel Cruze on the program

Who’s the worst spender?

>>Listen to Rachel’s comments on the show

Both sides seem to be about equal. Some people would think women spend more than men, but often they love the security of savings. It can easily fall on both sides.

What are the differing issues you see amongst socioeconomic levels?

How many people would be more free to go after work they love if they didn’t have financial shackles holding them back?

>>Hear Rachel’s comments on the show

The Scripture says, “The borrower is slave to the lender.”

The thought of quitting a job and not knowing where money is coming in... through the process of getting out of debt, there are things you have to do that you don’t like. Freedom comes with being debt-free.

Tom chimes in: You have to have a “big why,” otherwise, it’s so easy to self-medicate by spending money.

How do you tell someone who is in despair over their finances to dig in and make a change?

>>Hear Rachel’s advice on the show

Take personal responsibility. You can’t blame others for your situation. You are the only person who can change your life.

You have decisions that YOU have to make. It takes drawing a line in the sand.

Is there anything you can do right now that would make your life worse?
Is there anything you can do right now that would make your life better?

I have the power to make things better or worse and the choice is mine.

Are there different things that someone who makes $35k, $95k, and even $225k annually needs to know?

>>Listen to Rachel Cruze on the program

The principles stay the same. A person will need to follow those basic habits, whether they bring in $100k a year or $3m a year.